So, I guess it’s about that time. Time to write something to get off my chest. But, as you can see I’ve been wayyy to lazy to do so. And to be honest I feel like I’m just writing this post, because some people who read this, (u know who u are) aka two people, ha, asked me, why haven’t I wrote anything. I get why someone who doesn’t know me would want to read this because, well, they don’t know me and this is a way to see what I’m about, but I guess I’m either flattered or confused on why my friends would read this. I mean they talk to me all the time, they know what’s going on with me, so why read it? If you are my friend, please reply to this post and tell me, and don’t tell me in person, lets keep it awkward.
Something I’ve been going through lately is caring wayyy to much what people think about me, but only in certain aspects. My ego hates to admit this, it wants to be seen as the cool guy, the guy who doesn’t really care. And in some cases that’s true, but when it comes down to it, I want you to like me. If I don’t know you, I’m scared to be myself and I guess that’s normal in a sense. You can’t really be comfortable with someone you don’t know, cause you have no idea who they are, what they like etc. But these past two weeks have been worse than the usual case and I’ve been filled with anxiety. And now I know why! For the past two weeks, I’ve been slacking in the spirituality department. I’ve been meditating a little and some other stuff, but only doing just enough to get by. Which is fine, but I also have added stress from these projects I have been putting together, so doing the bare minimum, just wasn’t enough. It’s funny, when I get more busy with work, I tend to stop doing the things that allowed me to get there in the first place. Keeping my spirit side up must come first, or else I wont be able to do anything else. I went to Agape on Wednesday and just from that one night, feel 10x better, so I’m going to commit to you all, to keep going there and keeping my spirituality first.
Do you also get this, when life seems to get too busy? How do you keep yourself spiritually fit?
Much Love,
Mike Walzman
8 Comments
March 15, 2009 at 8:10 pm
Well, I’m not a personal friend of yours though, I’d like to think we are friends seeing as you’re my first blog commenter
, but I think they’d want to read it to get to know what goes on behind your pretty sunglassed eyes(the pic of you up top) It might just mean they care about you and want to know more about you. for me, keeping myself, spiritual mostly my family helps me with that.
March 16, 2009 at 6:20 am
I have lots of “real life friends” who read my blog. We don’t always talk about what I post. Plus, writing about things is different than talking about things. Mostly of my friends have commented that they have learned more about WHO I am through reading my blog than any other way.
But I am glad you posted again. I enjoy your posts and have been missing them!
March 17, 2009 at 7:18 pm
I think you’re right about the anxious thoughts becoming greater when you’re less spiritual. I feel the same way.
March 18, 2009 at 10:31 am
I’m not a personal friend either, but I am glad you’re back. Been checkin’ from time to time and your presence is missed. Helloooooooooooooooo?
Are you really back? Sorry to hear the spirituality had to suffer.
How do I keep myself spiritually fit? I don’t. It’s pretty chaotic for me, unfortunately and I do know that until I get something going in that area, it will continue to be chaotic. It’s not good. Not good at all.
March 23, 2009 at 11:36 am
I may or may not be one of your personal friends, but I have always felt a close connection to you. I really enjoyed this most recent post. I have always cared too much about how people view me and it has affected things that I do and decisions that I make, sometimes for the worse. I have recently been able to deal cope with this issue in a much better way. I heard a great expression and I have been trying to live by it: If you try to please everyone you won’t please anyone!
May 21, 2009 at 2:25 pm
wierd how i’ve felt the same way – recently i’ve been feeling iffy; although i have had the excuse of studying for finals and packing and unpacking between home and school..
&+ even though i don’t blog as often as you do, i have been slacking =/ but i realized, that’s what makes me feel better – then again, i tend to write about my personal experiences – my emotions in the heat of the moment.. so i release all that stuff on here..
yet unlike you – i have not told anyone about my blog – i prefer strangers reading my feelings – this way, i omit the awkward question/answer counseling..
hope your spirit heals quickly! go for a walk in the park to clear your head ;p
lots of luck; annakay
August 5, 2009 at 3:34 am
Hey.. you commented on me a while ago so I thought I’d have a read through your blog at some point when I have the time.
Just warning you though, now I’m here you’re writing to more than two people
I’ll be back, don’t you worry
September 7, 2009 at 9:28 pm
I love you.